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sewa · Platinum Member Joined: 06 Feb 2004 Posts: 1293

Ok Folks,

here's my song. I worked on it quite long, too long actually. My music teacher advised me to rework on the improvisation at te end, as he found it too sparse. I believe he is right so I tried to improve the thing this weekend. However, I'm too tired of this song and I really want to have it behind me and move forward. After few fruitless attempts I left the "improvisation" as it is, and decided to post the tune.

http://www.soundclick.com/util/getplayer.m3u?id=6236205&q=hi

Looking forward to your comments

sewa

Dee · Posted: Sun Feb 03, 2008 11:04 pm Post subject:

Hi sewa

Great song, the overall production sounds good to me!!

I don't know much about technical matters, so will leave that to the experts!

But just using my EARS.....I loved the panning effects at the start, altho the intro seemed just a bit too long. You created a great sense of space, and I liked the seemingly effortless fusion of all the musical ideas as the piece went along. I got this feeling of a journey through space.

The improv at the end did seem a bit sparse and uncertain, so maybe you need to give it a rest for a while and then record that bit some other time.
If you hadn't mentioned it, I might not have noticed this Laughing

Another song of very high quality in this OSAM!

Regards from
Dee

ellll · Posted: Mon Feb 04, 2008 12:36 am Post subject:

Hi Sewa!..

Well, very nice electric sounds indeed!

I in particular liked the enrtys of different themes/sounds...very interesting. After about 120 the themes got enough going to show some good electronica harmony, and it grew very well.

Your ideas developed right up to the improv...which, oddly..I found nice, if perhaps not "polished"..I didn't have any prob with the ending...I could listen soft and just sit and lighten up..but then I do like all electronica!! (just cant seem to write any...)

I did find the additional perc (begin at 240)..a little heavy for the basic overall theme...but in truth thats just me, and I was happy with the neat harmonic elements...

Very good job in my opinion..Sorry I can't give more full suggestions, but Jon will maybe...

Enjoyed listening very much!

Regards!!! John (ellll) Rolling Eyes

georgeinar · Posted: Mon Feb 04, 2008 1:44 am Post subject:

Way to go SEWA. I think this is very unique and I agree that the instrumentation is very well chosen. I really like the different pads and how it progresses. For me I think the sparseness at the end fits perfectly with the overall feel of the piece. That's how I usually do my electronic pieces, for me its sometimes because I'm not a very accomplished performer. But for certain styles, a deliberate lead like this is just fine. I also think when you don't put in too many notes it keeps it open for the rest of the sounds to continue with interest and not disappear. I think it's great the way it is. I get the same fatigue from my tunes and lose interest. Time to move on and do new stuff. Congrats. 11 more to go.
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JonSolo · Posted: Mon Feb 04, 2008 3:18 am Post subject:

This is a cool track!

The morphing of the lead partially through was awesome. In fact you could have kept on distorting it as the track progressed and it would have fit perfectly, especially by the end. The sparseness of the lead however allows so many other elements to shine. Great job there!

I agree with John on the additional extra kick at the 2:40 mark. It seemed a bit much and really didn't give anything extra to the track. That was the only caveat (listener) for me.

Your improv at the end is what the doctor ordered. Too much more and you would have listeners scratching their heads. As it was you gave us a nice buildup with a brief bluesy crescendo that tapered off the end.

Looking forward to more.

Jon

Edit: I just figured out what this reminds me of: Passport circa 1978 (Ataraxia/Sky Blue to be precise) except with a more modern beat. Great job! I love Passport!
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DrWho · Posted: Mon Feb 04, 2008 4:06 am Post subject:

I kinda liked the sparseness at the end - it does give the rest of the tune time to stand out. I might pull that voice a bit more to the forefront though.

Interesting beginning arp, and portamento chords. Your solo voice really interweaves in there holding it all together like a thin line. I should take notes - I have not been able to use that approach yet.

Re: around 2:40 - funny thing is the first time I listened to it I didn't even notice it. But now hearing it I agree - it doesn't really add to the tune.

Congrats on completing your first OSAM3 tune!
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Lorenzo · Posted: Mon Feb 04, 2008 9:07 am Post subject:

ok, since everyone wrote what they like I'll write what I do not Twisted Evil

uh, there is only one thing I can write here though: the "synth bass" sound in the first part of the song. I don't know if it's the timbre or maybe the decay... but I think it doesn't fit well in the mix.
Saied this, I think that it's a really well produced tune. Great OSAM start!
Regards, Lorenzo
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Diego · Posted: Mon Feb 04, 2008 10:55 am Post subject:

Hey guys, if it's the level of that OSAM, I'm going to remove my name from the list...I could never go even close to these great works!!

Really well done!
I agree with other "reviews", but it's time go forward, so forgot that tune and start working on another new one!

regards
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DrWho · Posted: Mon Feb 04, 2008 12:50 pm Post subject:

Ohhh Nooo Diego - there is no escaping the OSAM commitment. If you try and leave we will hunt you down and make you listen to Britney Spears music 24 hrs a day for a week !!!
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Diego · Posted: Mon Feb 04, 2008 1:20 pm Post subject:

NOOOO!!! Britney Spears noooooo!!!
Haven't you seen my 12 songs are already completed and online?!?! Laughing

Don't warry, I'll do the best to complete my songs, all your great works will be a motivating force for me!

regards
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Lorenzo · Posted: Mon Feb 04, 2008 1:22 pm Post subject:

I have his e-mail address and cell phone number too so if anyone wants to spam him with spears songs in the middle of the night I'll share them for free!
regards, Lorenzo
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Diego · Posted: Mon Feb 04, 2008 2:01 pm Post subject:

it seems I can't run away from KF and its OSAM.

Regards
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sewa · Platinum Member Joined: 06 Feb 2004 Posts: 1293

Thanks for comments everyone; I'm glad you liked this tune and I took notice of your remarks. We will have a lot to learn from each other in the upcomming months. I'm sure that all of us (including Diego) will make it through.

sewa

jazlover · Posted: Mon Feb 04, 2008 10:09 pm Post subject:

I don't have time for much commenting.
Real quick, I really enjoyed this tune. Nice all around. Well built, nice feel, nice direction...just very nice. I am not sure how I have missed your music untill now. Super start! Thanks!
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chordial · Posted: Tue Feb 05, 2008 1:52 am Post subject:

Great start Sewa,
You might be tied of listening to it (as can happen), but this sounds so fresh.
It evolves nicely, and I like the quirky improvs at the end, a little unexpected but fun.
Great 'in your face sounds' too.
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