Text for song "My city"

[SODA]

Hi, Guys !!!
How are you !!!
Hope you're fine !!!
I have one more song!
Please, correct my text:

1

My city doesn't know this,
And I don't know why,
When I have been growing,
He remained behind

My city doesn't know this,
Where I was so long,
But I still believe in
The place that I belong

Refrain:

It's more then time, we spent the life together,
It's more then love, my soul with you forever!

2

My city doesn't know this,
How I tried so hard,
To keep myself together,
Not to tear apart

My city doesn't know this,
And he doesn't know why
Why we are still together,
City of my Life !!!

============================================

Thnx a lot !!!

[xmlguy]

Hi, Guys !!!
How are you !!!
Hope you're fine !!!
I have one more song!
Please, correct my text:

1

My city doesn't know this,
And I don't know why,
When I have been growing,
It remained behind

My city doesn't know this,
Where I lived so long,
But I still believe in
The place that I belong

Refrain:

It's more than time, we spent [delete: the] life together,
It's more than love, my soul with you forever!

2

My city doesn't know this,
How I tried so hard,
To keep myself together,
Not to tear apart

My city doesn't know this,
And it doesn't know why
Why we are still together, <I'd suggest: "Why do I still live here" but that is an artistic comment, not grammatical>
City of my Life !!!

============================================

Thnx a lot !!!

[SODA]

Thank you xmlguy!!!

It's nice of you to correct me!

O yes! "Than", not "then", I know this,
probable this mistake was by chance,
cos I'm working to much all day long !!!...
But anyway it's sounds the same!

Tell me, please, is it normal if I will sing about
city "he" and not "it", cos he is alive for me?

Regards!

[xmlguy]

You're welcome, SODA!

Using gender with nouns is a bit odd except in special cases, probably because English doesn't use gender for noun, articles and verb conjugation, unlike other languages.

We might occasionally use she/her with boats and ships, or mother earth, but this is a rare usage.

Using the neuter gender for a city doesn't necessarily make it less familiar because anglophones don't think of it that way. Therefore, when you insert gender it just sounds strange unless it's done very carefully with a strong gender association throughout the whole work, so that it becomes more natural. Usually, using he/she with nouns just makes it obvious that it was done by someone making a mistake when translating from another language. So you can use he/she to refer to a city, but it really sticks out and stops the flow when an english speaker tries to understand what person he/she you're referring too.

I can understand that you're trying to emphasize your relationship to your city, but inserting a male-male connotation might not help unless you really want to imply that you're having a gay relationship with your city. If that's what you are trying to convey, then I suggest making it more obvious that is what you mean.

[tpantano]

Here's how I'd phrase it.

1

My city doesn't know this,
And I don't know why,
But while I've been growing,
It's remained behind

My city doesn't know this,
The place I've lived in so long,
But I still believe that it's
The place I belong

Refrain:

It's more than time, we've spent life together,
It's more than love, my soul's with you forever!

2

My city doesn't know this,
How I tried so hard,
To keep myself together,
To not tear apart

My city doesn't know this,
And it doesn't know why
Why I'm still here
City of my Life !!!

I just added and changed some articles to smooth it a bit, to give it more flow.